CPR…Choices and Personal Responsibility
by self help expert Sharmen Lane

How often do you say, “I didn’t have a choice” or “I don’t have a choice?” If you start to pay attention to the words you say I would bet it’s more often than you think. What would you say if I told you that no matter what, you ALWAYS have a choice?

I think it is incredibly empowering to look inside yourself and say, this was my choice. Then you can accept your situation and make better choices to improve it.

Robert F. Bennett the US Senator for the Utah said, “Your life is the sum result of all the choices you make, both consciously and unconsciously. If you can control the process of choosing, you can take control of all aspects of your life. You can find the freedom that comes from being in charge of yourself.”

As long as you think you don’t have a choice you will be taking or maintaining a victim position. If you don’t have a choice, then you can’t do anything about your situation and that includes improve it.

Let’s use and extreme example of a situation where one might say they had no choice. Let’s say you’re walking down the street, when someone grabs you and holds a gun to your head. They say give me your wallet. You hand over wallet and the thief runs off. Did you have a choice when you handed over your wallet? The answer is yes, you did have a choice. I’m not saying you had a bunch of good choices, but you still did have at least two. One was hand over your wallet. The other was not hand over your wallet. Now of course you are probably thinking yes but if I would have not handed over my wallet, I could have been shot or killed. And, you know what, you’re right. However, you still had a choice. You chose to hand over your wallet and live versus keeping your wallet and possibly being shot or killed. Give wallet live. Don’t give wallet, die. There were at least two choices. Terrible choices, but choices nonetheless.

Why would we want to hold onto our belief that there is no choice? Is it so that we can be the victim, so that it is not our fault that we are in the situation we are in? Is it so that we have someone else to blame?

We can’t change other people, but we can certainly change ourselves. That’s a beautiful thing because when we accept that we do have a choice, we can change our own actions and become the person that we want to be. Noone holds a gun to your head and says this is what you must believe. This is how you must act. Even if someone was holding a gun to your head you still have a choice.

The best thing about taking responsibility for your own situation and who and what and where you are in life is that when you do, you can change it. And that is powerful.

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